Are you a proper Wargamer? Because I'm not!



There's a bit of meme going through the various gaming blogs at the moment where writers are answering a series of questions to prove if they are a proper wargamer. The Wargaming Site started it all off and, in his usual in depth style, Sir Frontline gamer has written a lengthy piece about why we should ignore it. This makes the rest of this article rather academic but here goes anyway.

Spent at least £500 on figures / tanks - and you get extra kudos for every £500 you've spent
Over my entire gaming life I've easily spent £500 on little metal men, but I'm pretty sure I've not spent £1000, I'm far too tight for that.
1 point

Pricked your finger or thumb on a pike block - several times
I've never really been into regimental armies so I've never owned any pike men. I have however pricked my finger on a particularly pointy power sword.
½ point

Tried at least 10 different rule sets and vowed never to play half of them ever again
Let’s tally them up; Warhammer Fantasy 4th edition, 40k 2nd edition, Space Marine, Titan Legions, Warhammer 5th edition, Necromunda, Warmachine & Hordes. Even with some dubious double counting I'm only up to 8 so that's a no then.  My life has been sheltered by Games Workshop’s shadow so my experience has been limited. However this is increasing at the moment and I reckon if you asked me this in a year I could say yes and even avoid the dodgy accounting.
0 points


Is Spacer Marine and Titan Legions one game or two?

Bought an army off eBay

I've never bought an entire army off eBay but I did have to stop myself from buying miniatures off there when I realised I'd spent £85 in one week. It was the week after playing Warhammer 40k 5th edition for the first time and realising my armies had some holes.
1 point

Sold an army on eBay
Sell my beloved metal legions? Never!
0 points

Spent months painting an army - then used it in anger once

I think this is my default position, I always seem to do a lot more painting then I do playing and even then I don't think I do enough painting. I started painting my Eldar army in 1995 and it’s still not finished.
1point


Tried several different periods and genres
I'm too nerdy and subsequently I am mostly a sci-fi gamer, so that's a no there.
0points
Proper miniatures! (from Perry Miniatures)

Dropped a box of figures on the floor from a great height
Why? Why would you do such a thing?! I've never dropped a box of miniatures but I have had a box fly off the back seat of a car due to some heavy braking. Many Warjacks where lost (or their arms fell off to be precise)
½ point

Lost a battle on the last throw of the dice
Whether it is a wargame or a board game, I've lost loads of games on the roll of a single dice or the draw of a single card and those are the games I enjoy the most. It means that up until that point you've been very well balanced and it increases the tension and excitement of a game.
1 point

Made at least one enemy for life
I'm too nice for that. Though saying that I have a regular board game opponent where it has turned into a series of petty grudges, no matter what the game if I can find a way to screw him over and ruin his day I will. To even things out he’s just as bad.
0 point

Had a proper, stand up argument over a wargame table
As before I’m just too nice.
0 point

A typical view of my workbench, row up on row of unpainted models.
Thrown a dice across a room
I’m forever dropping components on the floor and my shuffling of cards of cards looks like an explosion in a paper factory but I’ve never thrown a dice across the room.
0 points

Rebased an army for a different rule set

The fact that I don't even understand this question probably means that I'm not a wargamer at all
0 points

Inflicted a whopping defeat on an opponent
I love games of all kinds but I am universally terrible at all of them.
0 point

Suffered an embarrassing defeat due to a stupid tactical decision
every.single.game I love gaming but I am terrible at it. I very rarely win any wargames and I make stupid decisions all the time, whether it’s putting my terminator squad in a land raider that gets blown up on the first turn or thinking there’s no way that Khador Devastator is in range of my Warcaster, I make stupid choices and pay the price.
1 point

Joined a wargamer club
Not yet, I've joined a board gaming club and I'm really enjoying it but my local wargames club is mainly historical stuff that doesn't interest me.
0 points

Bought a ton of lead that remains unpainted
With the changing times, most of my armies are now plastic, but the question is still valid. I have a Hordes battle box which isn’t even assembled yet, never mind primed and painted.
1 point

Been to a wargamers show

Does Games’ Day count? I'm counting it :)
1 point

Dice, lots of dice, lots of dice, lots of dice!

Have more dice than is logical or necessary to own - and have used most of them
This I think is a bit of red herring of a question, I have a giant jar full of dice, most of which come from playing Dungeons & Dragons and various old board games and I've used every single one.
½ point

Have taken boxes of troops down to a club just to show them off to your mates
I've taken my painted Warjacks to a board gaming club to show them off, does that make me weird?
1 point

Result 53% wargamer

I'm barely a real wargamer and that's not really surprising to me. I consider myself a gamer; a jack of all trades but master of none and although miniature wargames make a large contribution towards my gaming time and energy they’re not the centre of my gaming world.

The main reason I don't consider myself a wargamer is I'm only interested in the more geeky tropes; the science fictions, the fantasies and the steam punks. I don't see any appeal in Napoleonic battles or Romans vs. Goths, which is where I see the traditional wargamer. I want to see dragons and laser weaponry.

In the end though, does it really matter? The gaming hobby is so large and multi-faceted you can take what you like. It’s like a giant buffet where you can fill your plate with every kind of card game, board game and miniature game or you could just say you're not a fan of cheese and stuff your face full of mushroom vol-au-vents, I think I've lost my metaphor...

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